beginning.

what a chapter.

it's another new start, and even though i had a lot more knowledge of what i was getting into this time around, now that it's here and happening i feel overwhelmed and completely uncertain.

i'm back in new york, at a new job (an extension of last summer's internship) and i have a person. but it's not the way it's supposed to be. i shouldn't be in this kind of an emotional situation when i'm just not ready for it. too much, too fast. and it scares the shit out of me. i don't want to be the one to break a perfectly wonderful heart. but i know that i can't be there emotionally the way she needs me to be. i'm not the one who can give all of my heart, and i'm not the one she wants in the end. i can't do serious, and i definitely can't do long term. shit.

so much more to talk about, but for tonight it's time for sleep. work in 7 hours.